To make sure your child feels loved, firstly spend one to one quality time with them each day.
Researchers* recently found that a third of children don’t know their parents love them. Children may love electronic gadgets and doing lots of fun activities, but relationships are built and cemented when you spend time together.
Children need your time. And I’m not just talking about any time. I’m talking about time playing, talking, interacting, discussing, playing games, having fun, or playing rough and tumble. When you can forget all the jobs and things you have to do, and just focus on your child. Try to smile and laugh and be friendly at that time. Even 15 minutes a day is a great way to start. Allowing them to choose what to do and lead the play – without any criticism, judgement or advice.

Secondly, hug your child – 8 times a day if you can.
Physical touch is an important way to show acceptance and love. When you hug for 15 seconds, oxytocin is released in the brain – that’s the love hormone -which has health benefits and lowers stress hormones.
Another thing you can do is to give your child a massage or tickle or stroke their arm. Even when they’re not behaving well you can give them a squeeze or hold their hand or rub their back.
If your child doesn’t like to be hugged, find other ways to touch them such as ruffling their hair or playing rough and tumble or putting your hand on their shoulder or arm, or snuggling up on the sofa to read a book. Whatever you can get away with.

Finally, do little things for your child that show your love.

  • Cook their favourite meal.
  • Buy tiny gifts they’ll appreciate (but preferably not sweets.)
  • Write little notes.
  • Find funny clips on YouTube that they’ll enjoy.
  • Keep your promises.
  • Put aside magazine articles that they’ll like.
  • Take an interest in their hobbies or activities.
  • Watch their sports games or school assemblies.
  • Read with them.
  • Talk about things that interest them.
  • Take them out- just the two of you- to a café.
  • Tell them jokes.
    Find something you can do each day to show your love.
    And every day say the words ‘I love you’ as many times as you can.

So, the 3 tips to make sure your child feels loved are:

  1. Spend one to one quality time with them each day.
  2. Hug your child – 8 times a day if you can.
  3. Do little things for your child that show your love.

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If you need more than three tips on this – or you’d like to discover the secrets you need to have happy well-behaved, children – please contact me by clicking here. You can arrange a free 20-minute (no obligation) chat to find out if working with me personally (by phone, Skype or face-to-face) would help you and your family. Contact Elizabeth

child behavioural expert
The author:

Elizabeth O’Shea is a parenting specialist child behaviour expert and one of the leading parenting experts in the UK.

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